Most people think of wholeness as a linear process of detoxing trauma and re-integrating relinquished parts of themselves. They basically come from the premise that they’re somehow toxic and innately broken/wrong, and that they have to expend enormous amounts of effort to somehow make up for their shortcomings, to make themselves at least acceptable. Life is so hard after all…
I get people who’ve been clearing blocks, minding their thinking, setting intentions and what not for decades, and each time they slip up and mess up the ideal in their head that they’re not reaching, they punish themselves with bouts of addictive behavior, suicidal tendencies or angry outbursts…just anything to cover up the imaginary lack of sacredness, for which they themselves didn’t make space in their life.
Truth is, wholeness is like a clear sky. It can never go away. It’s always there at the core of your being. Sometimes clouds come in the form of repressive thinking, and they cover up parts of you. But the real you, the whole you, is still there. It can come out any second.
The real you doesn’t throw shadows. It’s only when you think you must hide parts of yourself behind the clouds, that you will see shadows and reflections. But you is pure light. You don’t need to fix yourself. You only need to let the shadows pass.
Thinking always changes, moment to moment. It’s only the lie-full tendency of the ego for self-consistency, which discards the changes, and instead in our minds creates an imaginary image of a fixed reality, a fixed persona and so on. It comes in all the time to tell you – ‘you’ve done this and that wrong, you need to improve, you are yet far from home…’. Well, what if I told you, that that’s just a thought you don’t have to pay any attention to? And that if you don’t, it will pass as if it never happened, and you will find yourself in you original state of wholeness? Your wholeness is just playing ‘now you see me, now you don’t’ with you. What if I told you, that there’s no right or wrong? That these are just the constructs of your own thinking and nobody else’s?
What if you let that thinking pass? What if you realized, that you can safely let go everything that pops up into your head, because it doesn’t mean anything? What if you could see, even just for a brief moment, that you are the reality behind all this thinking, and that you have access to a deeper knowing and sky-like clarity, that is your innate guidance mechanism?
What if you are already free and life is easy? How would that feel?
Here is a wonderful talk on Chiron by Ari Moshe Wolfe that compliments what I’ve expressed in this article.